Common issues
You may be considering counselling because you want to discuss one particular mental health issue, or because you’re experiencing a number of difficulties. There are many reasons why people choose to contact a counsellor. Find out more about some of the most common mental health issues, including: anxiety, depression, stress, confidence and low self-esteem, and bereavement.
Common mental health issues
Anxiety
Feeling anxious is a normal emotion that everyone experiences sometimes. It’s your body’s response to stressful situations or events, and is usually temporary.
When feelings of anxiety don’t go away and you experience them all or most of the time, even when there doesn’t seem to be a particular cause, you may begin to feel unable to cope.
You may notice you’re experiencing physical symptoms, such as tightness in your chest, an irregular heartbeat, rapid breathing, feeling dizzy, or having panic attacks. You may also have cognitive symptoms, such as worrying about ‘what ifs’ or things that might happen, repeatedly thinking about the same situation, or imagining and dreading the worst outcome.
Counselling can help you identify the causes and triggers for your anxiety, and explore ways to manage these. I’ll work with you to develop anxiety management techniques to reduce and regain control of your anxiety, which you can continue using after therapy has ended.
Bereavement and loss
Loss is something we all experience at some point during our lives. This can come in many different forms, including a death, relationship breakdown, ill health or injury, and changes of house or job. Grief is something we experience in response to a loss, either before it happens or afterwards.
Grief can affect you in different ways. Emotionally, you may notice you feel numb, hopeless, anxious, sad, or angry; while physically you may lack energy, be oversensitive to light or noise, have a lump in your throat, or experience tightness in your chest.
Behaviourally, you may become absent-minded, hyperactive, struggle to sleep or cry easily. While cognitively you may experience confusion, disbelief or hallucinations. Changes in financial position, job or living arrangements may affect you practically, while socially there may be changes to your friendships, role or identity. Loss can also affect you spiritually, altering your spiritual beliefs.
You may experience the effects of grief immediately after a loss, or not until many years afterwards. You might also experience them in anticipation of a loss. Counselling can help at any stage. Together, we’ll explore your loss and how it’s affecting you. We can reflect on any unhealthy coping mechanisms you might be using to deal with your grief, and find positive ways to adjust as you begin to move forward.
Confidence and self-esteem
Confidence and self-esteem is what you think and how you feel about yourself, and the belief you have in your own abilities. Sometimes, your experiences or the people around you may lead you to develop low self-confidence and self-esteem.
Having doubts about yourself, being self-critical, and avoiding challenges or difficult situations, are all signs of low self-confidence and self-esteem. You may experience feelings of depression or anxiety, and use unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as drinking alcohol. You may also believe you don’t deserve happiness or love, and demand levels of perfection from yourself that you don’t expect from others.
When you have low self-confidence and self-esteem, it’s common to find saying ‘no’ to others difficult, and to want to please those around you. You may believe this is the only reason people like you. You may also find yourself pretending to be more confident than you really feel.
Counselling can help you increase your confidence and self-esteem. We’ll explore the causes of your low self-confidence, and identify the thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are contributing to it. I’ll work with you to improve how you see and feel about yourself, and to turn your inner critical voice into an inner coach, so you can start talking to yourself with kindness and compassion.
Depression
Depression is a common mental health condition that can occur as a result of many different things, including difficult life events, physical illness, and childhood experiences. It can affect how you feel about yourself, others, and the world around you; how you behave; and how you feel physically.
While depression can range from mild, to moderate or severe, it’s generally experienced as feeling low for a period of at least two weeks. As part of this you may feel sad, worthless, numb, hopeless, irritable, angry, and isolated. You may also experience thoughts of self-harm or suicide. (It’s important to discuss any suicidal thoughts with another person or a professional, and to seek support from your GP.)
As well as affecting your emotions, depression can impact your behaviours, and may result in you becoming withdrawn, finding it difficult to concentrate, being unable to make decisions, drinking alcohol or taking drugs to cope, and losing interest in sex. Depression can also affect you physically, by making sleep difficult or making you more tired, changing your appetite, and causing unexplained aches and pains.
Counselling can support you to explore the causes of your depression, understand how you’re feeling, and identify any unhealthy coping mechanisms or behaviour patterns you may be using. We’ll work together to plan small steps forward at a pace that suits you, without any pressure or expectation.
Panic attacks
Panic attacks are intense experiences of fear or anxiety. They’re a heightened version of your body’s usual response to stress or danger, and can occur without warning. This can make them frightening to experience.
During a panic attack you might notice you have a racing heartbeat and difficulty breathing. You may also feel faint, dizzy or lightheaded; experience pain in your chest; start to sweat, shake or tremble; feel tingling in your body; feel very hot or very cold; feel sick; or feel disconnected from your mind, body or surroundings (known as dissociation).
Panic attacks can last anywhere between 5 to 20 minutes, or sometimes up to an hour. They’re usually at their most intense in the first 10 minutes. During this time you may fear you’re having a heart attack, going to stop breathing, going to lose control, or even that you’re going to die. The unpredictability of panic attacks can also lead to a fear of socialising or going out in public places.
Counselling can improve and reduce panic attacks by helping you find any patterns or triggers, and identify techniques you can use to control them when they occur. During therapy, we’ll work to improve your levels of anxiety to help reduce the frequency and severity of any panic attacks you experience. And we’ll develop coping techniques you can continue using after your sessions have finished.
Relationship issues
Difficulties can occur in all types of relationships, including personal, familial, friendships, and working relationships. Challenges in any relationship can affect how you feel about yourself and how you build connections with others.
Relationship issues can be the result of betrayal, bullying, abuse, childhood experiences, communication difficulties, conflict, low confidence and self-esteem, pressures from others, or fertility issues, among other things.
Counselling provides a space for you to reflect on difficulties in current relationships, and understand experiences from past relationships. It can also help if you’re looking to build new relationships and connections. As part of this, we’ll discuss how you relate to others, and explore your thoughts, feelings and expectations about relationships.
While I don’t offer couples counselling, exploring relationship issues from your point-of-view, without the other person present, can be invaluable in gaining clarity and feeling heard.
Stress
Stress is your body’s reaction to being under pressure or being threatened. Situations or events that threaten us or place us under pressure can trigger feelings of overwhelm, and lead to difficulty in coping.
While a manageable level of stress can motivate and energise you, high levels or prolonged experiences of stress can affect you physically and emotionally. Physically, you may notice aches or pains in your body, develop headaches, have a racing heartbeat, feel sick or dizzy, have difficulty breathing, or experience panic attacks. While emotionally, you may be irritable, aggressive, anxious, and feel a sense of dread or panic.
Stress can also affect your behaviours, and you may notice changes such as avoiding certain situations, not sleeping, crying more often, eating more or less than usual, arguing more with others, and being restless.
Counselling can help you manage stress by exploring the underlying causes and identifying the triggers. I’ll work with you to develop stress management techniques, which you can use to reduce your symptoms of stress and regain control when faced with future stressful situations.